The hardest part

she is three months old now. I can't belive it has only been three months.

Yesterday someone asked me what is the hardest part. I had to think.

The hardest part for me was the first two weeks. The worry was intense...is she breathing?why isn't she making any noise? What is that noise she is making????

I struggled harder than anyone can possiblly have known. Staying up till 7 in the morning because she wouldn't go to sleep. and then waking up at 9 for a feeding. I was exsausted emotional and on edge.

But it got better.

I was lucky enough to get the help I needed and I had D who was the most supportive amazing partner.

So the hardest part of mommyhood..for me...was admiting that i needed help. That i couldn't do it alone. and that the mommy instinct...didn't kick in immedietly