Thursday, January 22, 2009

Do I really look like someone with a plan?

Cause I'm not. No where near. But somehow I am the one who is planning the wedding. The thing that kills me is that I was in theater for four years. I was head of the prop department I had had to have a plan of some kind or else no one would have their props and Mr. rush would not be happy...lets face it "The rainbow would be in a sour mood" and no one wanted that. I am a teacher and my whole career revolves around planning and organizing. so why is this wedding kicking my ever widening ass!?! I think part of the problem is everyone has an opinion on what we should do. And as well meaning as the family's are it seems like none of them are considering the feelings of the main two people involved. Then there are the people who assume because you bring it up in their presence that they are involved and invited. for example


co-worker:Whats up wedding blues?

Me: Not really it's just stressful. Everything seems to be so easy when I write it down on paper but doing it seems like pulling teeth. Like the flowers...I just want the big pink daisy's with thick stems...

CW:OH MY GOD! I know exactly where to get those...I can take you this weekend and we can do more wedding planning! You need to let me know when the wedding is so I can get the time off!


OK so I know it might be bad to not invite the co-workers (I mean I like most of them) but small and intimate is the wedding David and I are going for. We are only inviting immediate family and the one friend who is coming is also our photographer. I hate telling people "no your not invited" but I know i will have to eventually. I wish David was more involved but at this point he is SO busy with work (he works hard...and has a very demanding job) that all he sees is wedding 10 months away...I have time...HA! We so don't have time. i have been through this once (I vaguely remember declaring a week before my first wedding that I would never do this again).

Not to mention the wedding porn that I have found on the new wedding website that Brina informed me on...I thought I was bad on the knot! of course She and I discussed it and a lot of the women on the knot are...well...kinda bitchy so I'm thinking not so much with posting there anymore. Le Sigh! ah well in ten months it will be over (of course we come back from our honeymoon just in time for thanksgiving and Christmas...I must have lost my damn mind planning a wedding that close to the holidays!)

Crazy thoughts!

Michelle"At least the wedding nightmares haven't started...yet"Gasaway

1 comment:

becoming brina said...

oh honey :-( i'm sorry the planning's kicking your ass, and i think it's totally understandable! I'm no great authority on this, having just started planning a wedding myself, but i've seen some really good advice on offbeatbride and in the anti-bride guide:
-get yourself a notebook and write down everything you've ever pictured in a wedding, regardless of cost or perceived feasibility. if that's riding in a horse-drawn carriage, write it down! if it's wearing a dress made entirely of butterflies and dreams, put it down there and hope your partner isn't the judging sort!
-decide which 3 things you HAVE TO HAVE
-have your partner do the same thing, preferably on a page facing the one you wrote.
-sit down with your partner over coffee (or, knowing us, wine. lots and lots of wine. a big ole BOX. of wine.) and go over the lists-what works, what doesn't work, what you think *could* work if you tried hard enough (see: butterflies and dreams) and decide what kind of a wedding you're going to have.
-do exactly that. you may hurt people's feelings, you may piss some family members off who think you should do it exactly this way, but it's YOUR WEDDING and a celebration of YOUR relationship, reflecting your beliefs and lifestyle.
if things are getting expensive, start designating to the people around you! most of them will want to help out and it will make the experience so much more meaningful for them because they helped make it happen. i can't tell you how many weddings i've done little things for-created centerpieces, set up tables, picked up wonton from the bride's favorite chinese restaurant for the reception, spent an hour trying to cut a freakishly dense brownie in 45 degree weather...and i freaking loved it. it's like doing a show-sure it's cool for the audience, but it's so much more meaningful for the cast and crew who put so much into it.
There are some groovy DIY wedding books at borders; and if you're feeling overwhelmed how about you and i have a bride date for coffee and checking out wedding books? I promise i have no opinions to force on you and won't insist on an invitation since i'm already your photographer! :-)
brina "should i just keep my last name since he doesn't want to hyphenate his either?" the awesome