Tuesday, June 22, 2010

Blog hop tuesday...the handcuff story.

Last November I accidently handcuffed my self to my kitchen stove.

I will give you a minute to let that sink in.

are we good? Ok...so here's the story.

Last November I was pregnant...hugely pregnant...for the sake of my readers here is a visual

Now D and i have alwasy had a great physical relationship and with the exception of one time when i ripped ass in the middle of sex...up till this point..it hadn't gotten dull.

But at 8 months pregnant...I was not feeling my sexiest and the only position we could comfortably use was doggy style...which lets face it...made me feel even less appaeling. Plus I was just plain uncomfortable.

I knew it botherd D but to his credit...he never complained and totally understood.

On the night in question I decided that since we would be very soon brand new parents of an infant to try and spice things up. (we of course had his neice and nephews at this point...but they were at grandma's)

I knew it was an early night for him and he would be home from work by eleven at the latest.

So I cooked a romantic dinner busted out the candle sticks and made a picnic set up in our living room.

And to make things more fun...I got my handcuffs out.

And since I had not used them in a while i had to make sure the key still worked...right?!?!

Now here is where I could blame my desision on pregnancy brain...but in all honesty...I would have probably done this pre=pregnancy to.

Instead of just cuffing one of the bracletes to my wrist and then unlocking it (because...you know that would make sense) I hand cuffed my self to the stove.

I don't know why.

I also don't know why I didn't think to grab the handcuff key that was sitting on the coffee table in the living room.

And remember how it was D's early night at work? yup...he endedd up staying 4 hours later.

I was 8 months pregnant...handcuffed to the stove...and because i was told to drink 5 million gallons of water a day...I had to pee.

Neccesity is the mother of invention...

I used a flower vase.

Needless to say D was surprised...and after laughing for 20 min. uncuffed me.

We had great sex the next night.

Welcome to the Tuesday Tornado Blog Hop!

We're a group of Bloggers wanting to branch out and find other blogs to read and follow. Interested? It's easy to join.

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Do you have to do this every week? Nope. Just as often as you want. But the more you post, the more followers you'll get. Active commenters and participants have a chance to be the featured blogger one week - meaning lots more visibility.

Each Tuesday we'll be doing a short theme. If you’d like to join in, next Tuesday we will be posting pictures of “Best Outfit Ever.” It could be real, sarcastic – your outfit or a celebrities. Let us know what you did by leaving a comment next week.

Have fun!
1. Diana @Hormonal Imbalances 20. Monkey Butt Junction
2. Chelsie @Forever&After 21. Janelle
3. Krista @ Not Mommy of the Year 22. The New Punken
4. Laura @Melodramamma 23. Tales of the Wife
5. Cindy @This Adventure Our Life 24. Emily
6. Metta @365 Days: 30 + Mommyhood 25. Gordon Casada
7. Alice @Life With Vivian 26. Natalie
8. LA @The Reel Life 27. Brynn
9. Amy @Rumble in the Kitchen 28. Jess
10. Belle's Butterfly Dreams 29. Angela
11. justine 30. Cristin
12. Katie 31. Sara
13. Angie 32. My Trendy Tykes
14. Goober Grape & Monkey Man 33. Ben and Carrie Tracks
15. Ms Diva 34. Michelle
16. Christina 35. chelsea
17. papoe 36. Tyesha Brow
18. 2 Much Testosterone 37. Kristin
19. Jess@Straight Talk 38. 2 Much Testosterone

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Diana said...

OMG I laughed so hard for the last part of this. That is too funny!

angela said...

Nice job using the flower vase! Stopping by from Tornado Tuesday. I couldn't pass up Captain Cleavage! I'm jealous; nursing has made me feel like your unfortunate sidekick: Sergeant Saggy!

Captain Cleavage said...

awww angela! lol. I know what you mean though. I thought nursing would be this easy thing that never affected my boobs...soooo wrong! lool

Jenn said...

This may have been the funniest thing I have ever read, ever. As to the flower vase though, well played! LOL